Ever have “one of those” days, weeks, months? Of course. We all have.
Well, it’s been that kind of summer for me. Early promise rained on, then rain, rain, rain, and summer racing past at an unreasonable pace. Well, that’s funny –complain about how bad the summer is and regret its fleeting nature? (There’s no getting ‘round it, though, is there? As soon as July 4thslides past, it’s downhill from there.)
We’re still recovering from a July 4thnear disaster, one of those if-not-for-this-then-that moments that come along in life, like: If it were not for quick thinking by a bystander, the baby might have been hit by a car; if it were not for stepping out from under the picnic tree to get better cell phone reception he might have been struck by lightning; if it were not for first responders administering Narcan the addict might have died.
If it were not for first responders, M might not be here, unscathed, today.
But a close call, even one that ends up with everyone all right, lingers, like the afterburn of an engine when the ignition is off. It shimmers in the light and rumbles in the dark, disturbing sleep and waking hours, too. And sometimes what makes it go away is that it is supplanted by another event, another close call.
Yesterday, cutting a watermelon, I nearly severed the tip of my thumb. If not for bad aim, I would have. And the subsequent first aid, and visit to Urgent Care took up every bit of our minds, and activities, and thought. And in a weird way, it was a relief, clear cut (pun here) as musings about if not for this, then that are definitely not. And it was a reminder about something I have learned before and will surely forget and learn again: that “getting over” life changing events just doesn’t happen. You don’t ever “get over” things that change your life. If you are lucky and determined you fold them into life and then move on to other events. Nearly hacking off a finger was delightful compared to being haunted by what could have been but wasn’t but might have been if not for. I guess it is the funny truth I am always looking for: a pain in your leg can take your mind off your headache…and that is a reminder that life keeps on coming and we just have to keep on going.
Because of my sore thumb I was going to take a break from blogging this morning – my first in more than a year. But then I got a message from my friend, G, (who has had to fold a whole lot of if not for this, that events into her life lately) saying she was looking forward to her Monday Vinegar Mother. So here I am, with love and thanks to G, sore thumb notwithstanding. If not for G, this blog wouldn’t be here.